Internal Struggles: A method for making good decisions

Internal struggles are tough because of the push and pull between intellectual, emotional, moral, and ethical considerations.  Inside those are financial, relational, and even physical elements. They aren’t easy, that’s way we call them “struggles”, but dealing with them effectively, and sooner than later, usually saves us from unnecessary drama and negative consequences. I’m suffering with an…

Thoughts, Words, and Actions: Fear or Love?

Today I’ve been thinking about the human condition. Specifically, how we relate to each other interpersonally, and the consequences of our thoughts, words, and actions. In the last week, several situations have been shared with me (personal and professional) wherein manipulative, narcissistic, mean-spirited behaviors were described. In each case, the costs – time, financial, and…

My three great bosses and what they have in common

I bet you can list the things you like best – and least – about each of your bosses.  Bosses are powerful influences for better or worse, after all. I spent some time during a recent flight contemplating how many direct supervisors I had during my nineteen years in the insurance industry. Then I thought…

Meet your amygdala: Your #1 emotional hijacker

Ever felt a strong urge to fight or flee?  You know what I’m talking about. Someone does or says something that triggers you. Your heart rate speeds up and your breath gets shallow.  I feel it through a tightening across my chest. You may feel it somewhere else, but you feel it.  It is how…

Got problems? Try out a new perspective.

What if your problems were really opportunities for growth? What if, rather than being damaging sources of angst, frustration, disconnection, and fear, your “problems” were actually opportunities to expand your capacity for awesome things like wisdom, creativity, patience, and connecting? The truth is, with a new perspective all of our problems can transform into meaningful…

LEADERSHIP? Authenticity is a must.

The other day I was talking with a leader I admire about the importance of authenticity in leadership.  We were discussing a particular issue within her organization and she said “I feel like I never hear anything authentic from him. There isn’t much I can do (for him) if he doesn’t get real.” Simultaneously, I…

Want more success? Stop playing the victim

This week I have an oh-so-critical message for you: You are not a victim. If you truly want to be more successful with (fill in blank) it is time for you to start owning your results. If you don’t like them, or would like to improve on them, you must make changes with regard to…

HOW TO NOT CATCH A BAD ATTITUDE

Have you ever gotten sucked into someone else’s nasty mood?  I narrowly escaped catching a bad attitude last week.  I was sitting in the waiting room at my doctor’s office, and a woman at the counter was fussing at the receptionist because they called her the day before and left her a message, but she…

THE PERFECT TIME FOR GRATITUDE

Gratitude: A feeling of appreciation or thanks. (Source: Merriam-Webster’s Learner’s Dictionary) As we approach the Thanksgiving holiday, and kick-off the “holiday season”, I want to share one of the easiest ways to keep your peace through all the preparation, hustle and bustle, and time with friends and family:  Practice gratitude. Studies have proven the feeling…

American Flag

THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE. Today and Everyday

I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE FLAG OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, AND TO THE REPUBLIC FOR WHICH IT STANDS, ONE NATION, UNDER GOD, INDIVISIBLE, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL. As Americans, if we had the privilege to be born here, we learn this pledge as children and recite it all our lives.  The…

Triggered? One surprising reason why, remedy included

We all have triggers. today i have a surprising concept for why we can be easily triggered by the behavior of others. Let’s start with what I mean by “triggered”:  Agitation, frustration, and anger are a few of the negative feelings associated with being triggered. They bubble up (or explode) when we bump into specific…