Way back in the 1980’s, after reading an article published by John Mayer and Peter Salovey, Dr. Daniel Goleman became fascinated with Emotional Intelligence (EQ). In his 1995 best seller Emotional Intelligence, Dr. Goleman turned the widely held view that IQ is the most important factor in attaining success upside down. More than thirty years…
This morning I’ve seen so many lovely 4th of July / Independence Day social media posts. Interestingly a big percentage of the posts share the themes of thanking our active service men and women, our veterans, and honoring those who have made the ultimate sacrifice in service to the United States of America. I so…
Not long ago I facilitated a week-long corporate meeting, wherein co-dependent work groups needed to develop urgent action plans. Significant problems had been identified with their program, and real progress needed to be made in a short amount of time. In order to succeed, the meeting environment had to support open communication, creativity, and action-oriented problem…
Have you ever made an assumption about something or someone, only to find out later you were completely wrong? Oh boy, I have. In fact, just yesterday I made a few ugly assumptions about a young lady I have never even laid eyes on. When I found out how wrong I was, I felt terrible….
Internal struggles are tough because of the push and pull between intellectual, emotional, moral, and ethical considerations. Inside those are financial, relational, and even physical elements. They aren’t easy, that’s way we call them “struggles”, but dealing with them effectively, and sooner than later, usually saves us from unnecessary drama and negative consequences. I’m suffering with an…
How effective is your current organizational structure? If you haven’t considered that question in a few years, now might be a good time to assess it. Your organizational structure should assure maximum efficiency and effectiveness, while supporting the accomplishment of big picture strategies and goals. Is it? Three of our clients are revisiting their organizational…
Today I’ve been thinking about the human condition. Specifically, how we relate to each other interpersonally, and the consequences of our thoughts, words, and actions. In the last week, several situations have been shared with me (personal and professional) wherein manipulative, narcissistic, mean-spirited behaviors were described. In each case, the costs – time, financial, and…
I bet you can list the things you like best – and least – about each of your bosses. Bosses are powerful influences for better or worse, after all. I spent some time during a recent flight contemplating how many direct supervisors I had during my nineteen years in the insurance industry. Then I thought…
Ever felt a strong urge to fight or flee? You know what I’m talking about. Someone does or says something that triggers you. Your heart rate speeds up and your breath gets shallow. I feel it through a tightening across my chest. You may feel it somewhere else, but you feel it. It is how…
What if your problems were really opportunities for growth? What if, rather than being damaging sources of angst, frustration, disconnection, and fear, your “problems” were actually opportunities to expand your capacity for awesome things like wisdom, creativity, patience, and connecting? The truth is, with a new perspective all of our problems can transform into meaningful…
A new client asked me a terrific question during lunch last week: “How do you win over someone who is resistant to you?” To which I replied: “I don’t know, have I started winning you over yet?” We laughed, but my responsive question was intended to be thought provoking. You see, a short time earlier,…
The other day I was talking with a leader I admire about the importance of authenticity in leadership. We were discussing a particular issue within her organization and she said “I feel like I never hear anything authentic from him. There isn’t much I can do (for him) if he doesn’t get real.” Simultaneously, I…